HTDO: Hold the door open for others.

Mathews, a hotshot sales manager, on a Sunday evening, was in the parking lot of a shopping mall. The parking lot was packed. Cars were crawling with anxious drivers looking for that one vacant slot. Mathews, sharp and aggressive as he was known to be, spotted a vacant space ahead and quickly zoomed in.  He could see another car trying to reverse into the same slot, but Mathews was determined to beat the other man to it.  And he did!  Mathews felt jubilant - as we all sometimes do with life's little victories.  The old man driving the car was disappointed. He looked Mathews in the eye and continued his search for another parking slot. 

Two days later, Mathews was preparing for one of the biggest moments of his career.  He was close to winning a big contract for his company.  And all that was left now was the formal handshake meeting with the client's CEO.  As Mathews walked into the client's office and saw the CEO, he felt a sudden sense of discomfort.  Yes, it was the same man from whom he had snatched the parking slot on Sunday.  And you can guess what happened thereafter.  Alas! If only Mathews had grown up with the HTDO habit!

So whats HTDO?

It has probably happened to you before.  As you walk towards the door of an office, or a hotel, the person walking in front holds the door open for you.  Remember how good it made you feel - if only for that moment. 

Isn't it surprising that although we all feel good when someone holds the door open for us, we seldom do the same for other? How come?

It's probably because we are all preoccupied with ourselves and obsessed with getting ahead.  Here, then, is a life-changing lesson they don't teach you in any B school - 'Hold The Door Open'.

The world can be divided into two types of people. Those who push open a door, walk through and let it slam behind them.  That's the 99% of the population.  And there's the 1% who hold it open to allow the next person to walk through.  Learn to do that, and you too could join the select 1% club.  HTDO doesn't merely make other people feel good. It makes you feel good too. HTDO translates into a behaviour of helping and caring.

Winning in life is less about naked ambition and more about helping other people win. 

Someone once said, "It's nice to be important. But it's more important to be nice"

Make a beginning.  Hold The Door Open...😊

Never underestimate anybody; Stay Humble.

Never underestimate anybody; Stay Humble.

THE SALES GIRL IN CHENNAI GIRI STORE, THROUGH THE EYES OF “ WASHINGTON POST.”

After the Temple Darshan at the Kapaleeswarar Koil at Mylapore, we entered the "Giri Trading stores"
and started searching for this Book on "Thatva Bodha".

We found many people buying various Books and CDs and from their smart walks and accumulation of CDs
from Abhang to Aruna Sairam and Bhajans to Bombay Jaishree, sent a nice feeling in us, that we have come to
the right place indeed.

I was looking for this Book while my wife started collecting Bharathiar's songs and MS's Music. I searched
everywhere for this Book.

There was this Girl, standing next to the Cashier, sincerely watching all our movements - a dark complexioned
Girl, should be from a nearby Village, might be 17 or 18, should not have crossed 8th Std., might be out of poverty
she is here.. All my Journalist's brain unnecessarily calculated about this Gullible Girl..and tho' she was repeatedly
watching me, I ignored her and started searching for "Thathva Bodha".

I saw many books from "Sandhya Vandanam" to Swami VIvekananda's "Chicago Speech" but having spent a
good 40 minutes. I looked at her, she also looked at me curiously.

I did not asked her, knowing fully well that such a girl cannot have any idea of anything, leave alone "Thathva Bodah".

"Sir, may I help you?" (in Tamil)
"Yes. I am looking for 'Thatva Bodha' "
"Sanskrit Text or English/Sanskrit?"
God..she knows. "Sanskrit & English"
"Do you like to have the Publication from Chinmaya Mission or Indu Publications or by Ramakrishna Mutt?"
"I don't know..I just want to only Learn you see.. I don't really know indeed"
"Do you read Tamil Sir?"
"Yes I am a Tamilian " (thinking to myself how most of mylife time I like to act in most Other places that I am not)
"Then Sir, you can take this"..she ran to the shelf where I had searched for 30 minutes, removed the books in
the front and came out with a Book in Tamil.
"This one in Tamil by N.Sivaraman by Indu Publications infact is simple and wonderfull. You have the Sanskrit
Text too inside."

My God! Why did I under estimate such a Genius. Just because of my Arrogance that I am an NRI. Or Just
because I presumed such a Black, dark complexioned, gullible girl, who would have come for this job out of absolute
poverty, wouldn't have any idea of "Thatva Bodha".

I decided to change my attitude and realized that I am absolutely an 'Idiot' at this moment in front of this
wonderful girl and submitted myself in all humility. "Madam, I really don't have any idea of even who wrote 'Thatva
Bodha' till yesterday. I just attended a lecture on this subject and was fascinated by the lecture and hence....."

"Did you attend Goda Venkateswara Sastri's lecture in Bharathiya Vidya Bhavan?"
"Oh God. How did you know?"
"He regularly takes classes on such subjects. In fact he is one of the best Sir, in the city on such subjects."
"You are interested in such subjects?"
"Yes Sir, I read a lot about Swami Vivekananda and Ramakrishna and Thathva Bodha incidentally is my favourite
Subject"
"Do you mean to say you have read Thatva Bodha?"
"I have read this one by Sivaraman. Once you read it you won't feel like keeping that book on the table at all."

"Why what is so great about this Book?"
"Sir,you must be joking that you don't know about 'Thatva Bodha'."
"Really. I accept my ignorance."

My wife was watching from the corner, admiring all her CD collections.

"Sir,according to me, if you read this it gives the entire Vedanthic Saramsam and to say it in-one-word you
become a bit more humble in life, leaving Ahamkaram once for all."

"Is it a fact that reading this simple book one would get so humble?"
"Of course one should be involved totally into the text. Needs a lot of conviction and devotion."

My wife joined the conversation and she felt this girl is indeed a very very talented intelligent girl, so she told
me, "Why don't you interview her for Washington Post? Why at all you should think of Paris Hilton?"

I also felt that I owe something to her.. So, I asked her whether she can spare sometime for an interview.

She politely refused saying "My boss is to give me permission. Besides, many people are looking for guidance
or help, like you and hence I have to go."

"What is your name?"
"Kalaivani."

My wife's admiration for her devotion to duty and her total involvement in her work, made her go direct to the Boss and said, "Sir,that girl Kalaivani."
"Yes very hard working Girl."
"This is my husband Viswanath."
"Nice meeting you Sir"
"He is the Senior Journalist in Washington Post."
The Boss stood up." Washington Post?"
"Yes Sir. I would like to interview this girl. I am highly impressed with her ethics."

The Boss called her. Time was 5:45 Pm. "Kalaivani, they have come all the way from USA., They would like
to spend some time with you. Can you?"

"Sir, there are so many customers waiting for some guidance. as it is a rush time. If they can come again
tomorrow."
"OK. I can come again tomorrow."
I came back next day morning leaving all my appointments with 'Times of India 'and “Madras Press Club “ just
to see this girl. It was no rush hour.

My wife and myself found out. Kalaivani is from a small village near Arcot. She has 5 sisters, she being is the eldest. Her father was a drunkard and he died a few years ago caring for none of them. Her mother used to work as
a helper in Masonry and passed away two years back, leaving all the 6 on the streets.

This girl who had completed her 9th std decided to search for a job and 'Giri Trading' came forward to help her out. She brought up all her 5 sisters with her and with her meagre salary she is taking care of them. All the 5 sisters
are going to a nearby Chennai Corporation School.

"Kalaivani. But when did you get this enthusiasm to learn about 'ThatvaBodha'?"

"Sir after joining here, I decided that the best way to be of help to the customers is to know the Subject first.
I took small Books on Ramana, Ramakrishna, Swami Vivekananda and started reading. I found the subject so fascinating..
I decided to read other books in Tamil like Bhagavad Gita, and Viveka Choodamani. Thats how...."

"What is your salary?"
"Rs 2,500/ a month, Sir."
"Are you able to manage all your expenses with the 5 sisters?"
"Not at all Sir, but the Boss helps me a lot."
"What is your aim in Life ?"
"I want all my sisters to get education. Then they would easily get employment. Is it not Sir?"
"If I give you Rs 10,000 per month, for meeting all your expenses, would that suffice?"
"It is indeed too much, but I would accept it only through my Boss."
We took her to the Boss and told him that we would like to send Rs.10,000 every month so that all her
sisters' education would be completed.

The Boss said "She deserves it Sir. You can trust me - I will hand over the amount to her every month
or alternately you can open an account in her name and start transferring to the account."

My friend John Paul, who is the Regional Manager of 'Times of India' had also come with me. He said, "You
have done a good thing."
My wife said, "I pray that 'Karpagambal' helps Kalaivani to become an expert in 'Vedantha' and start giving
lectures in USA . We can arrange for her lectures."

We left wonder struck! If we go into the interiors of India, how many more 'Jewels' like Kalaivani can
be found!!

I really became humbled!
Really the above incident teaches you an important lesson. Be humble and open always. Never underestimate others without knowing them. It can be misleading.

If anyone needs to believe in you, it needs to be you.

During a brutal study at Harvard in the 1950s, Dr. Curt Richter placed rats in a pool of water to test how long they could tread water.

On average they'd give up and sink after 15 minutes.

But right before they gave up due to exhaustion, the researchers would pluck them out, dry them off, let them rest for a few minutes - and put them back in for a second round.

In this second try - how long do you think they lasted?

Remember - they had just swam until failure only a few short minutes ago...

How long do you think?

Another 15 minutes?
10 minutes?
5 minutes?

No!

60 hours!

That's not an error.

That's right! 60 hours of swimming.

The conclusion drawn was that since the rats BELIEVED that they would eventually be rescued, they could push their bodies way past what they previously thought possible.

I will leave you with this thought:

If hope can cause exhausted rats to swim for that long, what could a belief in yourself and your abilities, do for you?

Attitude of Gratitude

A sweet short story worth reading....

Nearby, a building construction work was going on.

Lots of poor  labourers were working there and their small  children used to hold onto one another's shirt and play "train-train".

Someone would become the engine and others would become bogies

Every day these children used to take turns becoming the engine and bogies ...

But there was  one small boy wearing only a half pant who used to hold one small green cloth in his hand and become the guard daily.

So  once I went to him and asked him .."beta, don't u also wish to become an engine or a bogie some time ?

He softly replied .." Sir , I don't have a shirt to wear so how will the other children catch me to make the train?

I could see the slight wetness in his eyes..

But  It gave me a lesson.... he could have cried and sat at home and abused his parents for not affording to buy  him a shirt.

But instead he chose another way to play and enjoy himself..

In life, we don't get all things we desire and we keep complaining ..

I dont have a bike,  I don't have car , I don't have this or that etc...

. Life is like that ....we need to make it beautiful  and be greatful of what we have ..🙏🏼

HAVE AN ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE✅

Tiger in the Toilet

Kaizen Story: Tiger in the Toilet

Once a stranded Tiger entered the washroom in a Corporate Office and hid in a dark corner. Since there were people outside the washroom through the day, the Tiger was afraid to come out.

Many people frequented the washroom, but the frightened Tiger didn’t touch anyone. However, after four days it couldn’t bear hunger anymore, so it caught a man who had come in, and ate him.

This man happened to be an Assistant General Manager in the organization, but nobody noticed his disappearance.

Since nothing untoward happened, the Tiger became bolder and after two days caught another man and ate him.

This man was the General Manager of the organization.

Still, nobody worried over his disappearance (Some people even happy that he was not seen in the office).

Next day, the Tiger caught the Vice President who was a terror in the organization.

Again nothing happened. The Tiger was very happy and decided that this was the perfect place for him to live.

The very next day the happy Tiger caught a man who had entered the washroom while balancing a tray of teacups in one hand.

The frightened man fell unconscious. Within fifteen minutes a huge hue and cry ensued, and everyone in the office started looking for the man. The search team reached the washroom, flushed out the Tiger and saved the unconscious man. He was the tea boy in the office.

Moral of the Story:

It is not the position, but our usefulness to others that makes us lovable and respectable. 'If your subordinates are happy in your absence that means your not a perfect leader' .

Acknowledgement: From the book Tiger in the Toilet

The Seven Wonders

The seven wonders

Anna was a 9-year-old girl from the small village.  She finished attending elementary school till 4th grade at her village.  For the 5th grade onwards, she will have to get an admission in a school at a city nearby.  She got very happy knowing that she was accepted in a very reputed school in a city.  Today was the first day of her school and she was waiting for her school bus.  Once the bus came, she got in it quickly.  She was very excited.

Once the bus reached to her school, all students started going to their classes.  Anna also made it to her classroom after asking fellow students for direction.  Upon seeing her simple clothing and knowing she is from a small village, other students started making fun of her.  The teacher soon arrived and she asked everyone to keep quiet.  She introduced Anna to the class and told that she will be studying with them only from today.

Then the teacher told the students to be ready for the surprise test now!  She told everyone to write down the 7 wonders of the world.  Everyone started writing the answer quickly.   Anna started to write the answer slowly.

When everyone except Anna had submitted their answer paper, the teacher came and asked Anna, “What happened Dear?  Don’t worry, Just write what you know as other students have learned about it just a couple of days back”.

Anna replied, “I was thinking that there are so many things, which 7 I can pick to write!”   And, then she handed her answer paper to the teacher.  The teacher started reading everyone’s answers and the majority had answered them correctly such as The Great Wall of China, Colosseum, Stonehedge,  Great Pyramid of Giza, Leaning Tower of Pisa, Tajmahal, Hanging Gardens of Babylon etc.  The teacher was happy as students had remembered what she had taught them.  At last the teacher picked up Anna’s answer paper and started reading.

“The 7 Wonders are – To be able to See, To be able to Hear, To be able to Feel, Laugh, To Think, To be Kind, To Love!”

The teacher stood stunned and the whole class was speechless.  Today, a girl from the small village reminded them about the precious gifts that god has given us, which are truly a wonder.

Moral:  Value what you have, use what you have, trust what you have.  You don’t always have to look away to find an inspiration.  God has given you all the strength to reach your goals.

What is in your cup?

You are holding a cup of coffee when someone comes along and shoves you or shakes your arm, making you spill your coffee everywhere. Why did you spill the coffee?

"Well because someone bumped into me, of course!"

Wrong answer.

You spilled the coffee because coffee was in the cup.

If tea had been in it, you would have spilled tea.

Whatever is inside the cup is what will come out.

Therefore, when life comes along and shakes you (which will happen), whatever is inside of you will come out.
It's easy to fake it until you get rattled.

So we have to ask ourselves....what's in my cup?

When life gets tough, what spills over?

Joy, gratefulness, peace and humility?
Or anger, bitterness, harsh words and actions?

You choose!

Today let's work towards filling our cups with gratitude, forgiveness, joy, words of affirmation to yourself and others, kindness, gentleness, and love..
Have a fulfilling life.

Woman - Maya Angelau

Loved this poem of Maya Angelou -thought of sharing...15 points

1)"A WOMAN SHOULD  HAVE ...
enough money within her control to move out
and rent a place of her own, even if she never wants to or needs to...
……..
2)A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..
a youth she's content to leave behind....

3)A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
a past juicy enough that she's looking forward to
retelling it in her old age....
………..

4)A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ....
one friend who always makes her laugh... and one who lets her cry...
………..
5)A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
a feeling of control over her destiny...

6)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
how to fall in love without losing herself..

7)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
how to quit a job, break up with a lover, and confront a friend without; ruining the friendship...

8)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
when to try harder... and WHEN TO WALK AWAY...

9)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
that she can't change the length of her calves,
the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents..

10)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
that her childhood may not have been perfect..but its over...

11)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
what she would and wouldn't do for love or more...

12)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
how to live alone... even if she doesn't like it...

13)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW.. .
whom she can trust,
whom she can't,
and why she shouldn't take it personally...

14)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
where to go...
be it to her best friend's kitchen table...
or a charming inn in the woods...
when her soul needs soothing...

15)EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
what she can and can't accomplish in a day...
a month...and a year...

Pl pass this msg to all good women u know😊

True Gardener

Had tears running down when I read this?

Read on.....

He was watering the plants in the posh gardens of an International school, heat and dust didn't seem to affect him.

*"Ganga Das, Principal Ma'am wants to see you -- right now"...*

The last two words of the peon had lots of emphasis on them, trying to make it sound like an urgency.

He quickly got up, washed and wiped his hands and headed towards the  Principal's chamber.

The walk from the garden to the office seemed never ending, his heart was almost jumping out of his chest.
He was trying all the permutation and combination, figuring out as to what has gone wrong that she wants to see him urgently...

He was a sincere worker and never shirked from his duties...
knock knock...

"Madam, you called me?"
"Come inside..." an authoritative voice made him further nervous...

Salt n pepper hair, tied neatly in a french knot, a designer sari-sober and very classic, glasses resting on the bridge of her nose...
She pointed out towards a paper kept on the table...
"Read this"...

"B..but Ma'am I am an illiterate person.
I can not read English.
Ma'am please forgive me if I have done anything wrong... give me another chance...
I am forever indebted to you for allowing my daughter to study in this school, free of cost... I could have never ever dreamt of such a life for my child.."
And he broke down almost trembling:

"Hold on, you assume a lot...we allowed your daughter because she is very bright and you have been our sincere worker.. Let me call a teacher in, she will read it out and translate it to you... this is written by your daughter and I want you to read this."

Soon enough the teacher was called and she started reading it, translating each line in Hindi...

It read-

"Today we are asked to write about Mother's Day.

I belong to a village in Bihar, a tiny  village where medical and education still seem like a far fetched dream. Many women die every now and then while giving birth. My mother was one of them too, she could not even hold me in her arms. My father was the first person to hold me.. or perhaps the only person.
Everyone was sad.. as I was a girl and I had "eaten up" my own mother.
My dad was instantly asked to remarry but he refused.
My grandparents forced him by giving all logical, illogical and emotional reasons but he didn't budge.
My grand parents wanted a grandson, they threatened him to remarry or else he will be disowned...

He didn't think twice... he left everything, his acres of land.. a good living, comfortable house, cattles and everything that counts for a good lifestyle in a village.

He came to this huge city with absolutely nothing -- but me in his arms. Life was tough, he worked hard day and night.. raised me with tender love and utmost care.

Now I understand why suddenly he developed a dislike for things that I would love to eat when there was only one piece left in the platter.... he would say that he hates eating it and I would finish it considering that he does not like it.... but as I grew older I realised the reason and what sacrifice is all about.
He gave me the best possible comforts  beyond his capacity.

This school gave him a shelter, respect and the biggest gift -- an admission to his daughter...
If love and care  defines a mother... then my father fits in there.
If compassion defines a mother, my father fits in well in that category too...
If sacrifice defines a mother, my father dominates that category.
So in nut shell.. if a mother is made of love, care sacrifice and compassion...
MY FATHER IS THE BEST MOTHER ON EARTH THEN.

On Mother's Day, I would like to wish my father for being the best parent on earth... I salute him and say it with pride that the hardworking gardener working in this school is my father.
I know I may fail this test after my teacher reads this -- but this would be a very small price one would pay towards an ode to the selfless love of my father.

There was a deafening silence in the room... one could only hear soft sobbing of Ganga Das....
The harsh sun could not wet his clothes with sweat but soft words of his daughter had soaked his chest with tears.... he was standing there with hands folded..

He took the paper from teacher's hands... held it close to his heart and sobbed.

Principal got up.. offered him a chair, glass of water and said something... but, strangely the crispness of her voice was taken over by a surprising warmth and sweetness....

"Ganga Das.. your daughter is given 10/10 marks for this essay... This is the best essay ever written about Mother's Day in the history of this school. We are having the Mother's Day gala event tomorrow and the entire School Management has decided to invite you as the Chief Guest for the event...
This is to honour all the love and sacrifice a man can do to raise his children... to show that you do not have to be a woman to be the perfect parent...

And most importantly this is to reinforce/appreciate/acknowledge the strong belief of your daughter in you, to make her feel proud.. to make the entire school feel proud that we have the best parent on earth as stated by your daughter."

"You are a True Gardner, who is not only looking after the gardens, but also nurturing the most precious flower of your life in such a beautiful way...."

"So Ganga Das, will you be our Chief Guest for the event?

You are not a drop in the ocean but an ocean in every drop.

You are not a drop in the ocean but an ocean in every drop...said Rumi.

What did he mean by that... every cell in our body is intelligent to think and act.. We have 60 trillion cells in our body and our health depends a lot on the harmonic balance and cohesion of the cells with each other...

In the movie Eat, Pray Love, Julia Roberts visits a wise man in Bali, and he advises her not to try too hard to meditate.. in fact he suggests that meditation is nothing but smiling and the line that is a kicker, is "Smile with your liver"

If you believe that this is just a metaphor, lets look at the other end of the spectrum to prove just how crucial this is..

Let us say you hold a negative emotion towards somebody, something or some event in your life... each time you think of that your whole body re-lives the emotional upheaval of that association..

Your mind doesn't have a mind of its own, and doesn't know if the event is happening in real time or it is being replayed.. so it produces the same stress hormones.. each and every cell of your body starts feeling the same emotion of let us say "hatred" towards that event, person or experience all over again...

The body is not at ease.. this is a state where the condition of dis-ease sets in....

If you continue to live in that state, your cells are now getting conditioned to live in the same state...

The Upanishads talk about "Yatha Pinde tatha Brahmande" as is the atom so is the universe....

Health of a person, depends on how well all the systems of the body and the 60 trillion cells play the melody of harmony together..

When the cells are living in a state of hatred, they soon start exhibiting that with each other and killing healthy cells in the body...This leads to many forms of auto immune disease...

Like Rumi said.. you are not a drop in the ocean, you are an ocean in every drop...

Be careful of your thoughts, your feelings and your emotions...

Forgive people, not because they deserve it, but because YOU need it... 😊🙏😊